


fall to pieces

by PerahuKertas



Category: TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Anxiety, Boyfriends, Boys Kissing, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-12
Updated: 2019-07-12
Packaged: 2020-06-27 05:28:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19784200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerahuKertas/pseuds/PerahuKertas
Summary: When Soobin is fall to pieces, Yeonjun always there to make him as a whole again.(Or, Soobin is sick and tired and overthinks everything, Yeonjun wants his boyfriend to not be.)





	fall to pieces

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii idk, this suddenly come to my head when I see the tweets :/// anyway my baby soobinie the best leader, I don't make the rule. 
> 
> Unbetaed and etc because we die like men.

It's been a minute since Yeonjun pay his whole attention for Soobin, and the boy has been looking down at his hands or nothing particularly, he just look  _ lost,  _ empty even. Fiddling aimlessly with the ring on his finger, he's sitting next to him, he can tell the younger boy is feeling uncomfortable by the way he breathes, it sounds so heavy and forced that Yeonjun can almost hear it clearly.

To be honest, Yeonjun sure Soobin has a reason, he's maybe really tired, because this been a really long day, and a long month even, they preparing for their comeback and practice twenty for hours seven days, Yeonjun even surprised they're not collapsed yet, but they do need to rest, because Beomgyu and Kai has been sleeping through the way to dorm in the van, while Taehyun quietly watching through the window outside with earphones on his ears. 

Soobin is really quiet today, that's not because he's not as noisy as Beomgyu or as hyperactive like Kai did, he's not that chill like Taehyun either but today the boy is really weird, but when Yeonjun subtly ask if he's okay, he just smiled it off and told him not to worry. 

But that just makes Yeonjun worries even more.

He knows what kind of person Soobin is, he's been with him these past few years, and though the younger isn't an open book to read easily but Yeonjun knew, Soobin has always been one to hide and bury his emotions and feelings, he put all the burdens by himself on his shoulders, he's never been one to worry his members, but not that he doesn't know when the boy crying silently at nights, and all he can did is surpress the urge to hug the boy and just telling him everything will be okay. Soobin wouldn't want to worry him. 

The boy's breath is getting heavier, Yeonjun eyes him and notices how Soobin's fingers trembling slightly, he looks like he has trouble with breathing that his cheeks turned pale and he's sweating even in this cold weather. 

  
  


Yeonjun slipped his fingers between Soobin's and lacing them together, hugging the boy tightly from beside and he hold his cheeks, forced the boy to look at him, Yeonjun can see how terrified he looks, it makes something stung in his heart. 

"Soobin, what's wrong?" he whispers, tries to not sound worried that it'll makes situation even worse, he's speaking by the experience. 

"No-nothing wrong…" 

"Why are you looks so pale then? Are you sick?"

Soobin quickly shakes his head, but he bites his lower lip, trying to hides his ragged breathing, his eyes already glassy, Yeonjun let go his hand and cupped both of the boy's full cheeks so he can look at him on his eyes.

"Don't hide anything from hyung, if you're sick, just tell me so. Don't force yourself Soobin." 

"I'm not sick hyung, really. I'm okay…" the fact that his voice is cracked when he said that makes Yeonjun sad even more, nothing he hates more than seeing a vurnerable Soobin, he pulls Soobin to straddle his legs so he sat on him face to face, he wrapped his arms around the trembling body, embracing the younger boy. Though this is not the most comfortable position to comfort him, Yeonjun just want the anxiety attack to stop. 

"Shh, it's fine. Just close your eyes and try to sleep yeah? I know you're tired, try to sleep. Hyung's here…" 

He can hear soft sobs escaping Soobin's lips as the boy rest his head on Yeonjun's shoulder, he hugs Yeonjun's neck as if his life depends on it and hides his face on his shoulder, surpess his cry, while Yeonjun keep whispering words of comforts on the younger boy's ear, as his hands gently rubbing his back. Telling him it's okay to let it all out. 

Taehyun, who apparently has hear everything since the beginning look behind over the seats, he looks worried too, for someone who don't express much. 

"Is he okay?" He mouths quietly, Yeonjun softly shakes his head, squeezing Soobin's hand in his. 

Soobin is still trembling a bit, but Yeonjun can tell he's finally fall asleep with the little snores, his clothes a little bit wet from the boy's tears but that's fine. All he want is they arrive at the dorm quickly so Soobin can rest properly on his bed. Yeonjun can feel heat radiates from the boy's body, Soobin is definitely sick. 

They finally arrive at the dorm after what feels like a long ride, Taehyun shakes Beomgyu's and Kai's shoulder to wake them up, the two boys blinks their eyes rapidly and yawning. 

"Oh, what happened to Soobinie-hyung?" Kai asked, eyes squinting at Soobin who still sleeping soundly. 

"He's sick," Yeonjun stated vaguely, as if he wants to tell that Soobin's sickness isn't a mere cold. 

"Can you carry him inside? Or should we wake him?" Beomgyu opens the van door on Yeonjun's side carefully so he doesn't make a sound. 

Yeonjun looks like he's thinking about something for a while before shakes his head. 

"No, I'll carry him."

And with that, Taehyun, Beomgyu and Kai steps out the van first, helps Yeonjun to got out to without making too much movement that can wakes Soobin. Actually, Soobin isn't as heavy as he might look but it's his long legs that makes it difficult and almost impossible to not wake him up, Yeonjun feels relieved when he's finally can stand out the van with the younger boy still clinging to him like a koala, he does stir a bit but backs to rest his head on Yeonjun's shoulder again. 

Beomgyu helps Yeonjun with drapped his coat around Soobin, to prevent him getting even more sick in this weather, it's long enough to cover the boy's arms. 

"He's been drained," Beomgyu says quietly as they make their way to the dorm, Taehyun and Kai already far in front of them but Beomgyu keep his pace same with Yeonjun who walks slowly with Soobin clinging to him. 

"I know, he really looks exhausted these days," Yeonjun sighs, he's been noticing that too. And he's never tired to telling the younger boy it's okay to pour his heart out too to the members, that's what the use of oldest hyung right? When the younger members look upon and depend on leader, leader can do that too to the oldest of the group, and the other way around, but Soobin is so selfless.

"Hyung,"

"Hm?"

Yeonjun look beside him with a serious face because Beomgyu sounds serious too, the younger looks like he's deciding whether he has to tell him this or not but end up opening his mouth again. 

"I think… There's something really bad has been bothering Soobin hyung right now,"

"Yeah, I just… don't know what is it. He won't tell me,"

"Why wouldn't he? You're his boyfriend." Beomgyu chewed on his lower lip after he says that, Yeonjun doesn't understand what he's so mad about. 

"He barely tells me a thing about what's bothering him, you know him."

"Ya, it's that hyung, Soobin-hyung is always overthinking about everything, and everytime. You gotta see him react to those tweets."

"Huh? What tweets?" Yeonjun stopped himself when they're already in front the dorm, and raise his eyebrow in confusion, while Beomgyu just sighs and scracthing the back of his head, he seems like he's uncomfortable to talk about this but does he have another choice? 

"It's all over the twitter, they said… stuffs. About Soobin-hyung, and you know he always read stuff on the net even if it's good or bad."

"What stuff?"

"They said… he's not a great leader, he doesn't suitable for that, and his leadership sucks, because you're almost always in charge of speaking, they said you'd suit the place to be a leader." 

Yeonjun holds his breath, suddenly too afraid to take a peek on Soobin who's sleeping on his shoulder, no wonder he looks so sad and down these days, his poor baby, he even has to swallow some pills to calm down. 

"I'm just saying, please try to talk to him. He's a sensitive guy, things like this can get into his mind fast and they'll stay there in a long time." was what Beomgyu says before he opens the door for both of them. 

"Hyungh…"

Yeonjun pulled back to the reality when he hears Soobin mumbles, he quickly lays him down on the bottom bed bunk, felt a pang on his heart when he saw the reddened pale cheeks, and the closed eyes, even though they're closed Yeonjun can see the pain Soobin felt through his face. 

  
  


Why would anyone wants to hurt Soobin? He's just so innocent, selfless, he puts everyone first, he just wants the group's happiness. It's all that matters to him.

So why…

"Hyunggg…" 

He's mumbling again, this time the boy's face scrunched, he looks like he has nightmare, he keep mumbling something incoherent and tears running down his cheeks, Yeonjun quickly kneel down beside the bed, takes Soobin's hands in his. 

"What's wrong baby?"

"Hyung… hyung… I'm sorry…sorry…"

His voice sounds so broken, with a lot of misery, Yeonjun rubs the boy's cheeks softly, trying to calm him down.

"Why are you sorry baby what's wrong??" 

"I'm sorry… I'm not a good leader for you all, I'm so sorry." 

"Binnie… wake up…"

"I'm not a good leader… At all…"

Yeonjun is losing his patience, he grabs the boy's shoulders and shake him.

"Binnie, wake up!"

"I'm not---"

"Don't say that again, please, baby…" he pulls Soobin so he wakes up and embracing him again, he hugs the younger boy so tight, felt his eyes become hot as well, he buries his face on crook of Soobin's neck. 

"Please… please Binnie, don't say that."

Soobin, who just wake up and his mind still half wandering somewhere else feels a little bit confused when Yeonjun hugs him so tightly like this and keep whispering something. 

"Hyungie… what's wrong?" 

Yeonjun keep on his position for a while, before let go the hug and cupped Soobin's cheeks again, rubbing his thumbs on the reddened plushie cheeks. 

"You're saying things in your sleep, and that's not true. You're the best we could ever have, and no doubt for that." 

".........."

"Never listen what those people say to you, okay? For us, you're the sweetest angel we're blessed with, they know nothing about you. You're one of the strongest people I know Binnie, so please, hyung don't want to see you being sad like this again, okay?"

Soobin looks at him with glassy eyes, choke in sob before nodding slowly.

"I was afraid…"

"No need to be afraid because I'm here with you," 

"Hyung…" 

Yeonjun understand what his big baby wants, he slowly crawling onto the bed too and hugs him again, Soobin happily wrapped his arms around Yeonjun and buries his face on his hyung's chest, purring like a cat, Yeonjun who can't stand that cuteness pinches the full cheeks. 

"Ah, it hurts!"

"I'm sorry, your cheeks are like plushie."

"You can't keep pinching me," Soobin looks up the older and pouting his lips, which just make Yeonjun want to pinch his cheeks even more. 

"Oh?" Yeonjun smirked, now practically pulling the boy's cheeks and it makes his face looks funny.

"Of course I can," 

"Huh, I will go in a diet so I don't have cheeks for you to pinch anymore."

"Wait, no. I won't let you."

"You can't tell me what to do,"

"Soobin-ah, if you're going in a diet I'll feed you by myself." 

"Then!" Soobin hits the older chest lightly, still pouting.

"Don't be mean to my cheeks," 

"Hehe, I'm sorry sweetheart, come here. I want to kiss your cheeks." 

Yeonjun holds his face again, this time staring at those eyes witch such loving gaze, Soobin can feel himself squirming under the older's gaze and his tummy feels funny, just like the first time and it never changes. 

"You're my baby, the best leader out here, for me you will always be." 

Soobin closed his eyes when Yeonjun plant a kiss on his forehead, then placed another soft kisses on both of his cheeks, he touched his lower lip tenderly, and pressed their lips together in a chaste kiss. 

Soobin kissed the older back, wrapped his arms around his neck, trying to deepen the kiss, Yeonjun who knows his baby is being needy right now just smiled into the kiss and hold on Soobin's neck, felt the warm and soft cherry lips against his. 

He likes it when tiring days just end up like this. 

+++

_ "Oh god they're doing it again hyung," _

_ "Shhh!" _

_ "Do you think they will make out too this time?" _

_ "Shut up Hyuka," _

_ "But---" _

_ "Just sleep, pretend you don't hear anything."  _

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> its short? And basic. Sorry I haven't write for a while.


End file.
